I am The Curious Quilter, and I Approved This Message.

Wikipedia Commons Fall Scene
It is the middle of October, and in Minnesota the fall color has given way to falling leaves. Football is now sharing air-time with hockey. Pumpkins are on doorsteps, Halloween goodies in the stores. And, with an election less than three weeks away, we are simply inundated with campaign ads on the radio, television, in the mail, and even online. I think that campaign ads are a nightmarish way for voters to get information. Thankfully, this advertising strategy (often accusative or negative) has not hit other marketing arenas as hard. Can you imagine trying to make purchasing choices based on this style of ads? Well, I can…

Cali Co portrait, Fabric Candidate“My name is Cali Co, and I want to be your quilt fabric of choice! Nothing is more important in supporting a sleeping family than providing the comfort and warmth of a traditional quilt. I will work hard on your behalf to bring colorful traditions back into your quilts. I am a classic, and you can count on me to finish with cozy results!”
Paid for by the Calico Fabric Section of quilt shops everywhere.

Rich Solid portrait, Fabric Candidate“My opponent, Ms. Cali Co, calls herself a classic, but what can be more classic than a basic, solid foundation? I am Rich Solid, and I have a lifelong track record of working well with other fabrics, and getting the most striking results. When you make the choice to go with Solid, you choose enduring color that will never go out of style.”
Sponsored by the Basic Solid Fabric manufacturers’ associations.

Ba Tik portrait, Fabric Candidate“It is time to bring fresh life and vibrancy into your quilts! Nothing says ‘I love you’ better than a cheerful quilt made from vivid colors. No solid fabric can give the wonderful sense of motion and natural flow that I am well-known for. No busy calico has my clarity of color. Choosing me will bring new energy to your quilting! My name is Ba Tik, and I approved this message.”
Paid for by the Wax and Dye Society on behalf of Ba Tik.

Mottle Blender portrait, Fabric Candidate“In this selection, everyone seems to think that these extremes are the only choice! Cali Co and Ba Tik can both offer color to your quilts, but see how they clash with each other! Rich Solid can be striking, but his flatness is so severe. What we need today is a middle ground, combining the base of a solid, with the textural quality of calicoes and batiks! It is time for a working compromise that can bring quilters everywhere together. I am Mottle Blender, and I am throwing my threads into the basket and asking you to choose me for your next quilt!”
This advertisement was developed by the Middle Ground Blenders Association.

Rich Solid portrait, Fabric Candidate“Ms. Blender has accused Cali Co and Ba Tik of clashing with each other, perhaps over the use of color. She has even called my own colors flat and severe, and offers herself as a middle ground. As quilters, you have the right to choose, and not just between muddy blends of colors, or clashing sets of prints. I offer you a crisp, fresh approach to the sense of flow and pattern. By choosing Solid, you show that you do not need the clutter of prints and textures to make a quilt sing! Choose Simplicity! Choose Boldness! Make the Solid choice!”
Sponsored by the Basic Solid Fabric manufacturers’ associations.

Cali Co portrait, Fabric Candidate“It is time to put Solid back in its place, as a modest, receding background for the glorious traditions of finely crafted florals, vines, and dots that been the workhorses of the quilt industry for decades. Your choice of Cali Co says you embrace the history and roots of quilting! You are not mottled in your clarity, you know just how important it is to have a balanced print that brings your projects to life! A vote for Cali Co shows respect for our heritage!”
Paid for by the Calico Fabric Section of quilt shops everywhere.

Ba Tik portrait, Fabric Candidate“Cali Co has claimed to be rooted in the history of quilting. I say she is stuck there, along with her cousins Repro and Duction. We need fresh brilliance to shine through projects! Blender wants us all to take the middle ground. I call on you to take a stand for color, pattern, and the earthy naturalness that makes life rich! Let Cali Co live in the past, Solid stand alone, and Blender strive to have minimal impact. Ba Tik will make your quilts shine for generations!”
Paid for by the Wax and Dye Society on behalf of Ba Tik.

“Heritage? Solid, you would never have existed without me, and sometimes your colors run! I was around long before Cali Co tested her first patterns. Ba Tik is nothing but a swirl of dyes set against the resistance of wax! I am Mus Lin, and I AM the classic choice for quilt foundations and backs everywhere!”
The Unbleached Muslin shelf is responsible for this advertisement.

“Quilting has evolved into very sophisticated craft, and Mus Lin needs to head back to the utility fabric section” – Rich Solid.

“Perhaps the grapes on the vines that Cali Co so loves have fermented her judgement” – Ba Tik.

“Ba Tik may be an illegal import” – Mottle Blender.

“Let’s keep this debate focused on quilting traditions, values, and basics” – Cali Co.

“The basics? You can’t handle the basics!” – Mus Lin.

Tye Dye Fabric Guy loves all fabrics“Chill, dudes. Don’t you know that all fabrics are beautiful? I am Tye Dye, and I say we gotta work together. We all shine on! Peace out, brothers!”
Opinion of the Aging Hippies Who Quilt Society.


The views and opinions laundered by these fabricated characters in no way represent The Curious Quilter (well, except for the last one!) The Curious Quilter, as all followers know, thinks all fabrics are wonderful (even ones not mentioned here.) Perhaps that is why she makes so many scrappy quilts!


©The Curious Quilter, thecuriousquilter.net, maryeoriginals.com.

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About thecuriousquilter

Quilter, sewer, writer, gardener, mother, sister, friend, always learning, always curious.
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16 Responses to I am The Curious Quilter, and I Approved This Message.

  1. Martin says:

    OMG, you must be watching the same TV ads that I am here! Too funny.

  2. The most wonderful thing about our fabrics being advertised like this …… when they get totally up our nose we can buy them and cut them up!

    Judy B

  3. J. Johnson says:

    LOVE the personified fabrics! “In this selection….throwing my threads in the basket….Ba Tik may be an illegal import…” Where on earth do you get this?? Thanks for another great chuckle.

  4. Sarah C. says:

    I am a proud member of the Aging Hippies Who Quilt Society, although I absolutely resent being called “aging”!! Very cute post! And so much more interesting than the political commercials!!

  5. Blogless me says:

    Lovely post! I hope for the sake of american voters that candidates will take notice and improve their ways (I’m daydreaming, I know, but that is fine I hope).

  6. Mary this is an absolute hoot! And, a great discussion on fabric types. Your “ads” are way more informative than any campaign ads this year.

  7. Wow, Mary, – this was so funny, and informative too! It sounds like politicians are the same everywhere 🙂
    Great post!

  8. Shari says:

    Love your post! Thanks for visiting my blog. One of my visitors has entered a new candidate – Jap Ann – lol.
    Cheers! Shari (Mumsyblossom)

  9. Allie says:

    Oh my gosh this is hysterical – thank goodness we don’t have elections for fabric!!! You are too funny!

  10. Amy says:

    OMG! I love it! I may have to post a link on my blog just because I think that is so funny!

  11. Cindy says:

    Way to funny. Thanks for bringing a little levity to our current political ads.

  12. Donna says:

    Love Love Love it!

    Saw on the NBC nightly news that Minnesota has the area where the highest amount of $$ is being spent on one Congressional seat… the sample ads they showed were quite nasty and NOT informative. A pity that millions of dollars go into that instead of into something practical. Perhaps, if the two women involved were QUILTERS, they would understand the value of those dollars more!

    Thanks for the chuckle. I am partial to Ba Tik, but if she really IS an “illegal import” I may have to hide my stash of batiks…

  13. Tea says:

    Great post and you have a very creative mind. I actually love your characters and it would be really cool in a quilt, comments and all.

  14. Pingback: Hello World, Again! My Blog Turns One. | The Curious Quilter

  15. Jill says:

    Clever and so funny!

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